Mr Wise Guy Blog

Yeap, its the time of the year again. Happy Birthday to Me. Yey.

Its been a lonely, gay December with so many parking summons. Certis Cisco is feeling very gay this month having milked me for all I'm worth. Twice a week, I'd go to the gym, swim with mom (yes, mom is a swimmer. and a great one too!) and chat up random Tom, Dick n Harry on the streets. Oh how lovely life will be, if things are different.

JUST KIDDING!

I'm loving life as it is now! Gym makes me stronger, better, faster. My mind is at its best possible oxygenated state, and I can even take one minute free dives no sweat. My bike is working fine, the computer is still functioning and my pets are all well and healthy. Rekindled old friendships, forged strong bonds with new ones and played games like never before. So let us all be merry and celebrate, for today, came the birth of MrWiseGuy. heheh.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! TO YOU! AND ALL DECEMBER BABIES!

Some Iraqi journalist got so excited by US President Bush's visit to Baghdad, that he threw not one side, but both sides of his shoes at him. Moments before Iraqi journalist Muntazer al-Zaidi threw them, he shouted, "This is a farewill kiss you Dog!."

I'm sure there are people out there who find kissing a flying shoe utterly romantic.

Just watched Discovery Channel on TV, and decide to write this crap.

There's this mystical connection with water and me. While most fear water and see them as a potential death trap, I for one, have always been excited by it. There are so many ways to have fun with water. Kayaking, swimming, scuba diving, snorkeling, wake boarding, you name it. There's so many things you can do, that the activities are endless.

You are set in a totally different world. Suddenly there is no solid base where you can stand on, you are dependent on bottled air if you're scuba diving and you are at the mercy of your lungs. when free diving or swimming. But one shouldn't fear water, one should respect water and should never oppose its awesome strength. Think of tsunamis, giant waves, and the deep blue sea.

I started swimming late. Probably in Primary 2 or 3. Dad was my teacher. Then, I could only do the breast stroke. That changed when I started to swim seriously in the Polytechnic in Year 1 when my short 3 months stint in Lifesavers taught me how to tow someone in the water, freestyle, tread water, dive deeper and play a bit of water polo. I wasn't exceptional at it, but good enough to learn the ropes.

Short kayaking experiences in OBS, snorkeling in Redang, swimming at the dirty beaches of ECP and ferry rides to Pulau Tekong basically sums up my other experiences in water. Wanted to try Wakeboarding, can't afford it. Wanted to try Scuba Diving, can't afford it. Geee! When I grow up and I have a child, I'm so gonna make sure he/she gets to try everything!

Besides, it must be cool breathing from a tank.

Come to think of it, I'm starting to miss the beach. Let's just head to the beach this weekend shall we?

Alahai Emak Kahwinkan Aku, Oh Mother, please marry me off.

Not for me, but I like to keep my options open. :P

That sentiment is best reserved for my pet cat, Cika, a Munchkin Cat. She is about 7 months old now and has come into heat. Meaning, she is ready to mate and is spraying her scent all over the house. That is not a nice thing to have considering she has 5 other human family members plus 2 other siblings to share the space with. Besides, spraying her scent won't bring in the hunks as there are no male cats either.
She was sent to a vet near SIM just hours ago to get her sterilised. I booked the appointment, but couldn't make it as my wire came out and had to visit the orthodontist. Fortunately, everything went as planned and I needn't be present to see Cika through. The day before, she had to fast from 10pm. No food and water before the big day I guess.

As they say, a sterilised cat is a happy cat. Cika hasn't been eating well, not drinking well, and she has been running away from her human family members constantly. We dubb her the rat. With her short legs and long body, who wouldn't mistake her for the rodent downstairs? Mom calls her 'The Limousine', while I prefer the term 'Sausage Cat'.

Now, there's an improvement. She just finished off half a plate of wet food, and is now resting in confinement in Coco's SPCA cage. I'm not too sure if that was brought about by the fast the day before, but seeing her eat is just reassuring. Let us all just pray for Cika that she'll make it through and live up to a ripe old age of 15 years. Al-fateha...

(I wish I have a camera. Can't see shit with my W890i camera phone. Donations anyone?)

It was cold, it was wet, but there was lots of food...

And I made the return trip from Pasir Ris to Jurong, not once, not twice, but three times altogether. And when I was driving alone, I was caught with my pants down at 100km/h when the Traffic Police sounding its siren in the first lane behind me. Luckily for me, there was this Mercedes Benz doing 100++km/h in front.

What can I say... I have the Need for Speed.







Last but not least, for especially you (do you visit my blog?), this is Newton's First Law.
An object at rest tends to stay at rest and an object in motion tends to stay in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.

And that's it! You learn something new today!

We were chatting about how unhealthy one can get if one doesn't exercise regularly. You know, reasons for not exercising are waking up too late, not motivated, no gym buddies. So what happened was that particular person said, why not exercise in bed?

It made perfect sense last night. Exercise in bed means, doing exercises in your dreams in bed.

But somehow when I woke up today, it all seemed so wrong. Exercise in bed? OMG. So many different things come to mind and this conversation shouldn't even continue! Hahahahahaha. Well, hopefully that person doesn't get the wrong idea and I've started off on the wrong foot one too many times.

Till then... Its a rainy Sunday, and there's a bbq going on later!

Its songs like Something Stupid (Nicole Kidman & Robie Williams), Lucky (Jason Mraz & Colbie Caillat) and Come What May (Nicole Kidman & Ewan McGregor) that make life so beautiful. For that 4 or so minutes, you feel that time stops and the world revolves around only the two of the singers. And in my opinion, it is a readily available remedy for feeling emo or depressed.

Anyway, I think Nicole Kidman sung both songs very well.

Something Stupid Lyrics
I know I stand in line
Until you think you have the time
To spend an evening with me
And if we go someplace to dance
I know that there's a chance
You won't be leaving with me

Then afterwards we drop into a quiet little place
And have a drink or two
And then I go and spoil it all
By saying something stupid
Like I love you

I can see it in your eyes
That you despise the same old lines
You heard the night before
And though it's just a line to you
For me it's true
And never seemed so right before

I practice every day to find some clever
lines to say
To make the meaning come through
But then I think I'll wait until the evening
gets late
And I'm alone with you

The time is right
Your perfume fills my head
The stars get red
And oh the night's so blue
And then I go and spoil it all
By saying something stupid
Like I love you
I love you...

I just love contacting old friends. And its these kind of chats, carefree, clear cut and blatantly sarcastic that made my day. Pulling at each other legs and making fun of one another in a light hearted manner is definitely a welcome change from my normal serious self.

These conversations too at least help to keep my sanity following a major event that changed my lifestyle 2 weeks back. Heheh.. Like seriously. Now I'm hitting the gym twice a week whereas just 6 months ago, I would be travelling to different places each weekend.

Hopefully a lepak session would follow up that conversation and who knows, maybe I just found myself a good friend. Till then, gym sessions to keep my mind, body and soul intact and in optimum condition!

I think this will be my crappiest and full of deviations entry. Ever. I just need to write what's in my head. You know, trying to be Isaac Newton, finding the true physics in human relationships. The works.

Preface

So it goes that there is a guy who is in his early 20's. He has a loving, cute, sexy, chubby, adorable girlfriend (reminds me of the old days... Haiz) and a single female friend. Yes, it is an achievement for him to have female friends for he is really shy and nerdy. Frankly speaking, it is an achievement for him to even have a girlfriend. Skinny, bespectacled and geeky. Hmmm, come to think of it, maybe it was because he had nice teeth. heheh. And the reason why I had braces on is because I want to be as successful as him. Dang, I love my teeth. My front 2 teeth rocks! No more buck-toothed MrWiseGuy!
Ermmm... Some people are just blessed with nice teeth. Damn those smokers with nice teeth!

Chapter 1

This particular guy, had numerous conversations with the female friend. For ease of use, let's call her Apple and Apple, has a boyfriend. I like apples. No, like seriously. Apple is behind bananas in my favourite fruits list. Yeah the favourite food, favourite drink, favourite movies kind where you wrote in diaries in primary school? Yeah that gay book people pass around. I remember this line I wrote on a diary of a person I really hated in school.

Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue.
The only thing I'd do,
Is shit on you.

Back to story.

Guy knew Apple way way way back when he was in Primary 6? Eh when was it? K anyways this isn't an accurate essay either. So, there's this unspoken brother and sister relationship that the two are having. Hell, there are even times when Guy would join Apple for her activities eg. dance lessons. Guy was even Apple's dance partner! As nothing sprouted from this relationship, guy moved on and got himself a girlfriend. Soon after, Apple got herself a boyfriend. All seems dandy and fine, but what lurks underneath is an acid spurting serpent.

Until now, Apple talks to guy, like normally. Or so he thought. Every time Apple talks to guy in person, or guy talks to Apple, in a group, Apple will tend to walk beside guy. Not like they're holding hands or anything, but guy feels this tingling feeling whenever they hold a conversation. They would share jokes with only the two of them, share opinions, while the boyfriend was busy with others in the group.

Or if they were sitting in a group, there's this distant gaze that Apple seem to cast on guy. And for a moment, their eyes will lock and Guy has to pull away so that the others won't notice. Guy is unsure of Apple's motives, and contacts MrWiseGuy. MrWiseGuy ajak lepak at West Coast and so the story is published here. SORRY! No copyright issue right? For ol' times sake?

I dunno what advice to give but just bought him a Strawberry Sundae and pray that he chill out. Besides, I got a free ride. heheh.

Chapter 2

Guy is stumped, guy goes home with tummy full of Strawberry Sundae. Apple doesn't text him nor call him (that's normal). But the problem arises everytime Apple and guy meet. Even with the bf there, Apple would give that 'look'. (Frankly if I were him, I'd grab her from the clutches of evil and ride to Batam to get married or something. Sadly I wasn't him and he wasn't me, so story gets published at mrwiseguyblog.com). Guy is dumbfounded.

Guy has problems unrelated to Apple, and breaks up with gf. Guy meets MrWiseGuy for some LAN gaming session at Bukit Timah. Guy happy. Guy eat Nasi Goreng Pattaya at Al-Ameen.

One day, guy meets Apple again in a group. And he still receives the same treatment. Now that guy is single, guy asks MrWiseGuy for opinion on whether he should ask Apple out even though she has a bf. MrWiseGuy say "Jangan ikut nafsu la. Ko punya nafsu nie nafsu kuda kaper. Pakai akal sesungguhnya Tuhan berikanmu akal. Amin-to-po(TM)."

Dang I can't stop smiling now. That line cracks me up... :)

From my anal-ysis of the situation, it seems to me that Apple longs for the good ol' days when they were younger and everything seemed innocent. But apparently, things aren't gonna be the same and she seems to miss those days. Put it in a simpler manner, Apple still hasn't move on in life.

Chapter 3

One day during a meetup with friends, Guy asks for some private time with Apple. Apparently Apple has 'something' for guy and can't really help it as she's already with a bf. Guy straightens things up with Apple and try to settle things for the better, but Apple's bf misunderstood and argues with guy. In the end, guy and Apple's bf are no longer in talking terms. But still, Apple gives guy that look.

(This is a recipe for disaster and I really hate to be in his shoes. It is so inspiring that it led me to writing this gazillion words post)

So in the end, things are left hanging. Apple is smitten with guy, guy is confused but have a tiny weeny little bit of feeling for apple, and MrWiseGuy here is so stumped, that he decides to write it down so he has no need to remember the details. Man, I love blogger.

Alternative Chapter 3

One day during a meetup with friends, Guy asks for some private time with Apple. Apparently Apple has no feelings for guy but she was surprised to learn that guy has something for Apple. Apple is left confused over whether to choose bf or guy, and ends up jumping off her 11th storey apartment head first.
Conclusion & Recommendation

If you were guy, would you even clarify with Apple?

Take into consideration that guy is:
1) A Pacifist
2) Shy by nature
3) Skinny
4) That was his first gf
5) Guy has ORD-ed. Eh I oso ORD oreadi! So happy la.

It has been a while since I last bought a PC game. Tell you the truth, I've never bought a PC game in my life. Ever. The prices are too steep, the entertainment value is minimal and I find that paying $59.90 for a PC game is just not financially viable. Perhaps if prices were to drop to $10, then I'd see some logic into getting one.

Most of the time, I get PC games from friends who no longer want to continue playing.
Until now, I've still yet to catch on the Playstation 3 and Wii craze They are seen to me as cumbersome, backward and once again, not making any financial sense. Why pay more than $700 for something that only plays games and dvds, when you can get a wholesome entertainment system (the Personal Computer) for the same price? Yes, you may argue that the controllers are different and the graphics are better. But PC systems have gamepads and joysticks to up the gaming experience doesn't it? Besides, it would be bloody difficult to play DoTA, Starcraft or Company of Heroes on the console without a moust isn't it? About the graphics, PCs are much easier to upgrade than consoles. Just buy a 9800 and chuck it in your PCI-E 16x slot and voila! Instant upgrade!

Nothing could of course match the Wii experience. hehehe. I was tempted to get one.

So it all depends on the person on which platform he's suitable with. I for one, am an advocate for Personal Computer gaming!

Is there such a thing as a body clock? An internal clock set deep inside your body that regulates your sleeping and awake times? Apparently I have successfully screwed it up and can't go to sleep now. Congrats Mr-NOT-SO-WiseGuy.

It began immediately after the exams. Played DoTA, after DoTA, after DoTA, after CoH, after CoH, after DoTA, after etc etc. Something like 'lepas dendam' playing games and soon enough, I find myself screwed up. Like literally.

I find myself sleeping at 6 in the morning all the way till 12. I do my thing in the day, and stay awake all the way till 6am the next day. Like what the... This is really flipping my life upside down. I should be awake at 6. Not sleep at 6! WTH!

I'd be sleepy around 11pm, but somehow the adrenaline from midnight DoTA kept me awake and hyped up. True, gaming can create some stress. But I never thought gaming could screw up your body clock.

To set my body clock right again, I shall stay awake and not sleep. Am gonna take a short 11am to 12pm nap, and that's it!

Oh, and I got 3 cats now. *FAINTZZZZ

Things haven't been looking up for me this month. I'm bumming around, not revising my Engineering Math, I'm not accomplishing anything and I don't even go out! I SHOULD be on holiday but my finances isn't in the green at the moment. OMFG I am such a loser. Its not even me, myself and my Honda. More like, me, myself, and my Hewlett Packard. heehee.

My computer is really one of a kind, just like my Honda. Woooohoooo.

So anyways, I got tomorrow planned out. Gym at Gombak, Sim Lim Square at noon and fix computer in the evening. Seems like a plan and hopefully I'll have an enjoyable Wednesday. See you tomorrow! Daadeedaaa....

I've been playing this game for two days straight am boy am I enjoying myself. It is great fun taking over the city, driving around, sightseeing and stuff. Can't get the real thing over in America, even the digital experience would suffice. I have a feeling that the game models the streets of NYC accurately.

A nice cool Hari Raya Haji eve, along with a few good rounds of Cluedo made my day. I didn't expect myself to pick up the game quickly and was quite surprised to win the last 2 rounds. Must be lady luck smiling down on me. Or is it just that I thrive in games where you have the opportunity to deceive. hehe.
Lets run through the game a bit. Basically, you try to guess who was the murderer, the murder weapon, and which room the murder was held in. It is great fun and a good starting point to get your 'poker face' right. Initially I couldn't help but express excitement when my cards were called. But after a few rounds of practice (and losing), I somehow got used to it. Pity the brothers who kept asking "Eh, what was the card you showed me!? I forgot!". hahaha. Damn cute la. But oh well, the rules are clear and I'm not obligated to re-show or repeat myself.

For a thorough read on the gameplay, click CLUEDO RULES AND GAMEPLAY.

I thought board games were the typical roll dices, move your pawns, and reach final destination like snakes and ladders. But somehow, Cluedo spawned a new era of discovering interesting board games that is definitely fun and engaging.

And that game took my mind off things for a while. :) I'm so digging that game.

After telling a friend what I've been through today, I can safely conclude that nice guys finish last. Its the bad boys who take the spoils of war. The women, the gold, the ship and everything else. We nice guys only get the scraps and we have nothing to show for at the end of the day. Not even our intelligence (which I got back? Lolx!).

Only our aching mind, body and soul...

If you have, you're a nice guy and generally you get nowhere with women! Sure, you get on well with women you meet, but somehow they always befriend you, meanwhile dating a selection of asswipes. They even have the temerity to cry on your shoulder about these guys. This usually involves the line "oh why, sob, can't I meet a nice guy?" while you silently scream "I'm here, I'm here"! The ultimate bummer, eh guys?The graph above is the graphical representation of the old maxim that nice guys get nowhere with women. It's an exponential decrease, so your chances really plummet the nicer you are. If the scenario outlined in the paragraph above describes you, then you're in section c of the graph and it's terminal, I'm afraid.
Source: pikyvag.blogspot.com

Well, I'm not saying I'm a good guy or a nice one. I've been nice, I've always been a pacifist, I try to avoid arguments and make peace every time when its possible. I don't go around looking for trouble. I make love! No Wars!

There are people who get the wrong idea. The other guys who think you're a sweet talking flirt and desert you to be friends with other brawnier brainless guys. But thing is, these guys just beat around the bush and stab you in the back. We nice guys don't do that. We are forthright in our dealings, and always, as always try to put the other party at the winning side just so they feel at ease.

I'm totally awe-struck by another friend of mine. He spoke of ethics and values in life. He wasn't someone I'd usually buy ideas from. But the more he spoke, the more wise words came out from that narcotine laden mouth. I particularly like the part when he said that he would go all out for a friend. Particularly close friends who have been with him through thick and thin. And he would even go so far as to getting hurt just so that this friend wouldn't have to go through the pain.
There are some things in life, you only get to choose one. Be it your PC, your Honda Wave, your cat (yes you can have many, but only 1 must've been really tender to you), your bed, you know... Stuff that really matter to you. (I'm being very indirect here). There's only one. You chose one, you'll stick with it. And you can't get another one unless you're a very very fair man.

I'd say I'd rather not take the risk of clearing things up with the people involved. I don't want any misunderstandings, no tragic events. Its best we nice guys absorb the damage incurred, and hopefully with perseverance, we'll make it through the darkest hours. Yeah like the one in DoTA. 125% mana regen, 5hp per second regen. Or perhaps I need a heart? Adds 35 strength and 15hp per second regen.

Now, I have lots of unplanned Saturdays and Sundays. Anyone wanna go out for a drink? Ice-cream? Gotta catch me cause my 'days are numbered'.

About 3 months has passed and I've noticed something familiar getting back into me. Something that has got me to where I am today. Something so close to me, yet I lost it while serving National Service. And that something is, my intelligence.

It is true that National Service can have a negative effect on your mind. For me at least. You were not motivated, you were bombarded with constant propaganda, and the extras you serve seems never-ending and all you want to do is just go home and sleep the worries away.

Doing that for about a year and 10 months had successfully made me stupid and have the heck-care attitude. But now, I guess things change. I'm getting sharper mentally, my mind works better and I am self-motivated. Definitely a good thing to have considering I have 21 AUs to clear next semester.

I hope this fire will stay burning hot throughout my life and may it bring prosperity and happiness to all of mankind. Chey chey!

Does coffee really affect a woman's chest? Do not be alarmed as yet as this thesis still needs further investigation. A team of Swedish researchers found that if a woman drinks 3 cups of coffee or more per day, she may have smaller breasts.

A related survey was done and published in British Journal Of Cancer which involved 300 women who were addicted to drinking coffee. The study showed that those who drink 3 cups or more coffee per day tend to have 17 percent smaller breasts size than for those who had less than 3 cups per day.

Too much caffeine have some influence to the body hormones and thus its effect on having smaller breasts. "Drinking coffee might effect the size of breast and may resulting in much smaller breast size," said Helena Jernstrom from University of Lund Sweden.

Thus a more laborious investigation need to be done before proofing that drinking coffee makes a woman flat chested. The survey thus reminded us to be in moderation in everything that we consumed. Die die must have a cup of coffee in the morning to jump start my day. No coffee like can not do anything, must be the caffeine. One cup in the morning, alamak got kick! than can start work. I have been thinking alot after reading this article.

What do you think?

So it goes, the month-long holidays are here, and I'm just bumming around at home, heading to the gym, swimming and lepak sessions at a friend's house. Dang! I want to spend my time better here hello! I'm not getting any younger! Anyone out there raring to go out for a kayaking session? Camping in Ubin? Trip to JB?
Missed the times in the polytechnic where I'd be busy from day 1 in school up to even after graduation. There's always something up, something to be settled, finances to be balanced, friends to meet and events to hold. The EXCO which I never really get to gel with. The members I really never get to know well. Geee! I don't think that will happen anymore. When school starts and the 21AUs coming up, possibility of me fooling around will be like the odds of the sun gobbling up the Earth.

Hmmmm... I think I watched too much Discovery Channel.

Oh well, I'll just make do with what I have and whom I have available.

How do you know when the heavens are feeling happy and gay?

They send you a smiley of course! No, I'm not kidding you but the stars light up with a huge big smiley plastered across the night sky. Hop on over to the BBC website (Smiley Emoticon) to check it out.

What happened? Venus, Jupiter and the moon somewhat lined up perfectly to form the smiley. And I doubt this is a normality. heh. Kudos to the photographers who managed to get these once-in-a-lifetime pictures!

Something significant occurred this week and I've yet come to terms with what has just happened. It is one of those days when you feel like your life does not have a meaning anymore and you wish everything will remain just the way it is. But no, life has to go on and hopefully, if all the stars align, Capitaland Shares gain some ground and 4D number strike, it is for the better.

It is the school holidays now, and the examination results will be released only in late December. I'm trying to put my mind off of this matter and concentrate on my Engineering Math, setting off for the gym, get reacquainted with my secondary school buddies and play lots and lots of games!
So, one small step for Man, one GIANT leap for mankind. It is NOT The End, but instead, a New Beginning...